Sex should be fun and pleasurable, but this is not always the case when you or your partner climaxes too soon, right? When you come too early, you leave your partner frustrated, and this is not healthy for your relationship. Nowadays, there is a lot of information on the internet, magazines, and even in Hollywood movies suggesting that sex is supposed to last for at least 30 minutes. Also, many men are too self-conscious about holding on, and they tend to believe that most women love more extended sex sessions. However, much research has it that during sex, an average man often lasts about 2 minutes. But again, there are some natural ways both men and women can hold back an orgasm and last longer during sex.
So in case you are finding it challenging to hold on during intercourse, this post has highlighted eight tricks to last longer in bed. Keep reading to discover how easily and naturally you can hold on in bed, and make intercourse a pleasurable and fun thing (as it should be) for you and your partner. So here we go;
1. Take time kissing your partner
Kissing does a lot of magic during sex, and if you do it well, then it can make you last longer in bed, studies show. Kiss like you would in your teenage days when you could slowly make out on the couch for hours. Remember? Before doing anything, relax and make your partner relaxed and comfortable as well and then start kissing, letting your lips explore your partner’s body. Spend time kissing, and let yourself be kissed too.
2. A massage can do the trick
Okay, so you are a busy person and transitioning from a busy day to pleasurable extended sessions of sex seems to be a problem? Well, the truth is, squeezing sex into a busy and often stressing life can be quite challenging. However, one of the best ways to de-stress and turn your partner and yourself on for stimulating sex is through a good massage.
You and your partner will need to learn how to give a simple but satisfying massage for about 5 to 10 minutes. Take turns massaging each other before you get into the real thing. A massage before intercourse will help both of you to relax and breathe deeply. You can offer each other a butt, back or foot massage to prepare you for more pleasure and comfort. A great massage is sure to help you last longer during intercourse.
3. Be sure to take turns
This is one of the best tricks to last longer in bed, and it works for both men and women. Forget the traditional give-and-take way of having sex, where you touch your partner when you are touched, and rush to finish together. Start taking turns, allowing yourself and your partner to feel the pleasure. This, in simple terms, means that you should switch to the Giver-Receiver pleasure mode. When you are the giver, you just need to make sure your partner gets as much pleasure as possible. When you are the receiver, relax and receive pleasure. Learn how best to use your hands and lips to give your partner enough pleasure.
4. Have sex in a comfortable environment
You might agree that when you are overexcited during sex (for instance when having public sex), you tend to finish too early. When you have sex in a place where both you and your partner feel relaxed and comfortable, you are most likely going to last longer. Therefore, as much as possible, avoid places or things that are too exciting.
For instance, if you tend to be more relaxed and comfortable in your bedroom, then you better stick in there until you are able to control your organism regardless of where you are having sex. Always remember that the more comfortable and relaxed both of you are, the more likely you are to last longer.
5. Let her climb on top
Man, let her climb on top, it will help you last longer. How is this the case? When she is on top, your dick is less stimulated. Again, remember to tell her to go a little slowly since you will hardly endure faster and long thrusting. Also, try entering her and stop moving for some minutes to acclimatize your penis to her warm and wet inside.
6. The start-stop technique
This is a simple technique that usually works very well if done correctly. If you are a man, for instance, you can have your girl or woman stimulate you until just before you start feeling your orgasm and immediately ask her to stop. Ask her to continue after the sexual tension stops. This way, you will definitely last longer in bed. This technique also works for women. Your man can stimulate you, stop before you climax, and proceed again after your sexual tension has stopped.
7. Try breathing from your belly
Did you know that deep breathing usually correlates with an ejaculation? Therefore, to hold on your orgasm and last longer during sex, try breathing slowly and deeply to reduce anxiety and stress. Also, try breathing such that the belly rises outwards before your chest. You can practice this kind of breathing when doing the start-stop technique or in your yoga class.
8. The Kama Sutra might be helpful
The Kama Sutra explains a lot of techniques, but there is a particular technique that might help you and your partner last longer during sex. In this technique, you need to begin very slowly, usually with just one in-out stroke every 3 seconds. You will then build strokes slowly as you proceed with intercourse of between 4-5 minutes until you start moving one stroke every second. If you start feeling like you are about to finish, stop and then hold yourself while still inside your partner until you gain control again. Start the entire process all over again.
9. Stop Overthinking
Your mind is a powerful tool; what you feed it determines how it will perform. When fed with stress, your mind will manipulate your entire body into acting accordingly. You will likely experience amnesia, loss of appetite, a migraine and even string premature ejaculation along. It is therefore advisable to fully pay attention to your body and all that’s happening to it during intercourse. Instead of thinking about your unpaid bills, your boss’ nasty remarks back at the office or your cars’ mechanical needs, focus on the current events; that tingly feeling when she licks your nipple, the sound of her moans, the weakening of your knees, erect manhood and so on. These thoughts will help you focus more on the activity hence delay ejaculation.
10. Be Creative
Truth be told, some sex positions are able to stimulate you more than others. They are more sensual hence stand a chance to keep you aroused for longer. If you are ever going to find out which ones work best for you then you’d better be open to experimenting. The good old missionary style is a safe position. You will be able to keep going for longer as opposed to ‘doggy style’ position. If your penis is able to easily go all the way in and sort of hit a wall within the vagina then you will ejaculate quickly.
The missionary style may be tradition and boring but start out here until you can master full control over your ejaculations.
11. Muscle Control
Every man is familiar with the overpowering, tense and strong sensation that accompanies an ejaculation. This tornado seems is sweet and extremely weakening all at the same time. Ejaculation is controlled by a special muscle known as the PC muscle. Gaining control of this ‘feel good’ muscle will give you power over your ejaculations. When relaxed, it is difficult to ejaculate. Although this feels like an easy mission to accomplish, it isn’t. In fact, it is considered the most difficult muscle to control.
It is a task that will take a lot of practice and time. The more you keep at it the more delayed your ejaculations will be. After some time, you will gain full control over this muscle hence determine when to ejaculate or when to hold it in for a while longer.
12. Control Your Thoughts
Traditionally, premature ejaculation was considered a mental health issue. Therefore, men who suffered from it sought help from psychiatrists and/or hypnotists but it never worked. Premature ejaculation is more of a physical illness. One is more likely to achieve a result by tuning their bodies to the sexual activity.
However, this does not rule out the mental part of it. Failure to manage your thoughts, confidence, and concentration will interfere with your ability to last longer in bed.
Another effective way to get in touch with your sexual response is via masturbation. It allows you great power to manipulate your response. For this, you simply need to get yourself as close as possible to ejaculation then stop just in time not to. For instance, on a scale of 1 to 10 with the ejaculation point being 10, masturbate til level 8 then stop. The sensation will be intense but your body will cool down instead of ejaculating.
Repeat this as many times as possible until you master the art of delaying your orgasms. Once you are able to tame yourself via masturbation, you will successfully stop the orgasms when having an intercourse.
14. Learn from the Pros
Learning how to cool down your body after a near-orgasmic experience is an art that will determine how well you perform in bed. In this case, one can only achieve this through pointers from an expert via eBooks and videos. You may want to invest in the new revolutionary sex guide for men- male enhancement coach.
15. Alter the Pace
Another grand way of gaining control over your ejaculations is by changing the pace at different intervals during sex. Like usual, start off at level one and pump your way through to level 4-5. By now, you are likely in another world with quickly building up pleasure. Level 5-8 is usually intense and you can literally feel your semen brewing in preparation for an orgasmic release. Just at the verge of level 8, slow down your pace back to a one then repeat the process. Remember, just because you want to cool off doesn’t mean that your partner is. Therefore, keep her satisfied through all this.
During the cool off point, withdraw your penis and flicker it up and down between her labia. There is a cluster of nerve endings just below her vaginal opening so target this area in order to heighten her sensation. When you are cooled down enough, get back in and work up the pace gradually. You can do this as many times as possible. It is not easy but with time, you will be able to perfect this skill.
There are 3 areas of a penis that are known to help a person gain control over their ejaculation. The base of the penis is one of them. You need to create a ring using your thumb and index finger and wrap them around the base of an erect penis tightly. This will stimulate the penile ring which is an excellent trigger point since it is packed with a dense web of nerves. Another trigger point is the base of the penis head that’s also sensitive. Last but not least, manipulate the perineum. This is the base between the testicles and the anus. All of the points have nerve endings that will heighten the experience and drive the blood flow to the penis.
These tips have been proven to be effective in lasting longer in bed. The best thing about them is that they can be applied by both men and women. The ladies can exercise these steps with their partners hence encouraging them to hold back ejaculating. You can easily tell when a man is about to orgasm through his breathing, stiffened thrusting and tense muscles. Before getting to level 10, she can withdraw the penis and switch positions or commence foreplay whereby he’ll get a chance to cool off and accelerate all over again.